Back FrOm aFrica...

..well I didn't really go to the mother land but I might aswel ave! The amount of Nigerian weddings and parties I have attended within da past couple months, I tell ya...

If you have ever been to an African party/wedding you can definalty relate to this post..

You know you are at an African social gathering when ...

"Spraying"...The celebrant &/or best dancers get showered with $dollars even thou we are in England.

All the daughters under the age of 30 have to help serve food.

Me plus 1 really mean me plus 100 and my whole tribe..

Live band playing sum serious "Shina Peters"

Supermalt & Guinness... as my pops would say... SUUPAMOT!! To wash down sum mouth watering Jelof and fried rice...

Not forgetting there is like 500 people in a hall with a maximum capacity of 100.. and by the end of the night you go home with packed lunch for work the next day and a whole bunch of random gifts such as mugs, bags, umbrellas and household cleaning products like bleach with da celebrants face on it....

You gotta love your culture..

Nigerians + big hall + birthday/wedding = "DANCE DANCE DANCE.. AND FORGET YOUR SORROWS!"

Twitter @T_offthwall

offthewALL

Cut me some slack!!!

We've been gone for a hot minute, tryna get some personal issues sorted out, like gettin my third nipple surgically removed or JonBoy getting his Circuits rewired. Whatever the reason we were gone, I've decided that I'm going to return to posting as quite a few people actually enjoyed my posts and gave us quite a bit of shit for not Posting.

So just an easy one to kick off...

Take a look at the latest Promo for my homies @Origmoz and @EmaTheKid for the soon to be released mixtape, ABOVE & BEYOND!!!

Ema-The-Kid & Origimoz : ABOVE & BEYOND (Promo 02) from On.Cut Films on Vimeo.
Twitter.com/​emathekid
Twitter.com/​origimoz
Above & Beyond Promo Video 01
Video : 5d Mark II, Iscorama 36 and Nikkon 55mm f/1.2

This is the kinda easy laid back listening I need in order to be productive, so I'm actually mad excited, and pee'd myself a little when I heard the instrumental in the Video...the video production is pretty tight too.

Above & Beyond + Chicken + Kush Sativa = Creativity cummin out my balls!!!

Great to be back!!!

JoeyDaKid

7%

He had it all... the fans loved him, his enemies respected him enough not to bother with voodoo, an adoring wife!! mothers compared their children to him, fathers called him 'son'. Presidents called him for advice. There was even a rise in the number of kids called Bobby!!! But on Sunday 22nd August, the Worlds greatest hero fell to one of the most ugly illnesses ever created by the CIA, they feared he would blow the lid on fake intelligence that would allow corrupt governments to have Mind Control over their subjects and was thus purposely infected with the MUMP's virus!!!!!

Mumps, if u havent had it is the baddest, meanest, gnarliest virus a man can get. On the Sunday i looked like i got into a fight with a young, fit, Mike Tyson and he just wanted to punch the right side of my face, next to my jaw. I musta been Rocky and not known when enuff was enuff cos by Monday morning both sides of my face had been patted by those cruel gloves and the swelling was ugly!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3wuXyOUKJw

I have this theory, if a human being's vitals drop lower than 7%, they are probably headed for the upper room!! I can maybe laugh it off now but when i was on 8% vitality, unable to move, swollen face, unable to eat because of swollen saliva glands and jaw paralysis, i started to wonder if the upper room would be better for me.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxP1Z-a2Yn4&feature=related

As i felt sorry for myself wondering if the curse was ever gonna shift, another bombshell dropped that definately nearly took me to 7%, My baby making capsule started to ache, with one pod growing to almost twice the size of the other and the pain delievered to the body upon urinating can only be described as frightening, in fact no word of a lie I passed out the first time and almost the 2nd. The pain is the equivalent of having a mentally challenged gorilla trying to give you a handjob!! (not soo far fetched as some ppl still insist AIDs came about from man fuckin a monkey) The delirium that accompanies the pain saw me imagining John Coffey walking into my room and saying, 'Bobby, i'm here to helps take it away' touch my nuts and my jaw and spit flies out his mouth! However in clearer thought i'm not sure if i'd be comfy with a guy like that coming into my room when im defenceless, he may 'take away' more than i want took!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tA9MpkJ_iWM

I cant be assed to write anymore but u also lose erectile functions for the duration of the ordeal...ive had it, will never have it again...MMR dont save you for sure...good luck

Fixie'n BrickLane and Beers

Seeing as our beloved England blessed us with da sickest weather of the year so far on friday....
Couple of the lads spontaneously met up in Brick Lane for some red stripe and did abit'a fixie cruising....

.... and all I gotta say is.. BobbyDigital aka Raph is da biggest show off on this planet...

summer riding is magical I tell ya...

offthewALL

Belly's gonna GET YAAAAA!!!

My stomach is becoming some what bigger than normal... why?.... Because I faaakin lurrv beer!!
 (Using Harvard style referencing) Fig.1 , 2 & 3  support the above statement..

Fig.1

Fig.2

Fig.3

So I tweeted about it... got a random @ from this bot @bigbeerbellies ... (hate dat shit)..

BigBeerBellies 

  

@T_offthewALL see this awesome Beer Belly site http://BeerBellyNation.com?=mtu4

Clicked on it.. laughed my head off 4 about 5mins at the fat cunts on there... then thought fuck me.. that's all  the motivation I needed to hit the Gym...

Operation '50 Cent movie wieght loss' commence..

offthewALL

Now dass my kinda price!!!

If like me you spent your May wages before May even kicked in, on repairing your God forsaken car, buying new parts for your fixie, binging on Haribos Starmix (only the fried eggs and love hearts), then like me you'll love this. A whole bunch of free weekend events which are guaranteed to keep a smile on your gob.

1. NYC Streetwear giants MISHKA, are teaming up with I HEART... who brought you I HEART SECOND-SON to provide another free rooftop BBQ and music in THE MACBETH in Hoxton. Gets our Cocaine't4kidZ guarantee to be a good'un.

2. White Kids present...Bounty/POP UP Pirates Launch party. Now we all know what BOUNTY is about, if you dont read the fucking flyer Moron and past experiences tell us that this is gonna be a MUDNESSSS!!! In my opinion Pop UP Pirates is an unknown option, but da DJ lineup clarifies any confusion, definitely spoilt for choice on Friday night...how often does that happen and you dont have to pay.

3. ...finally Blogging Champions YO MAMA present BEEF...East Coast VS West Coast @ the people dems favourite venue THE MACBETH. Oh yeah, did I mention that its free.

What about Sunday? You ask...What the fuck you think this is, I work a 9-5 man, everyone knows Thursdays are the new Fridays

And there you have it...I lay it out for you to play it out

Nuff Said

JoeyDaKid

Yooooo Azzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

NEW GARMS BRAAAV!

Reset is back once again... so if you need some fresssssh T's for da summer this is da place to be.... come down and Cop some garmz from the the sickest local brands on Saturday and Sunday 29th &30th of May..

Click HERE for the facebook events page.....

Introducing

So we've got a new member of da Cocaine't massive...

SOME SAY....

"He sheds skin twice a year"

"He doesn't play the lottery.. because he already has enough balls"

"He knows everything there is to know... except the definition of mercy"
"He drinks Napalm to soothen heartburn"
"He CAN slam a revolving door!"

But to be honest all we know is that hes name is Bobbydigital...

What is he going to bring to the blog? I hear you ask... well fuck knows im asking the same question myself, but one things for sure he has love for the POONANI just like all da other Cocaine't memebers..

Look foward to hes posts...


offthewALL

Talk Art to me Baby!!!

Move over Sir Isaac, there’s only room for one Newton round ‘ere, Rowan Newton to be precise. Hailing from Brixton SW9, Newton studied a degree in Illustration at University of Westminster and has been producing visually stimulating art pieces ever since. His work ranges from urban imagery to cult comic book characters and depictions of iconic landmarks in London. His artwork has featured internationally in exhibitions in New York, London, Amsterdam, Miami and other cities. Feast your eyes on some of his eye-catching pieces below and click here to visit his website.

*This and the first image are probably my favourites

If you enjoyed some of the above pieces, then you’ll be happy to know that you can see Rowan Newton’s art work at the Vibrant Art Vibe exhibition at Vibe Bar Gallery in the Old Truman Brewery off Brick Lane from 4th - 6th of June. Where there’ll be a combination of fine art and sculpture from other artist and some alcohol flowing on the night.

Bit of Alcohol + Pretending to know about Art = Me looking like a Prat, but having a good time

Nuff Said!!!

JoeyDaKid

Game Of The Week (No Premiership)

Mr JoeyDaKid had a Cup final this weekend... so the lads went along to go an support him an hes team...

It was a good match match but they ended up losing 5-2.... YES FIVE GOALS TO TWO!!!..

Joey played shit, kept on getting injured every 10mins and got a yellow card... but we still cheerd him on like a bunch of hooligans,

eres a couple MOTD snap shots......

CRRUUUNNCH!!!

It got abit heated I tell ya!

Joey gets injured an had to b stretchered off the pitch

..then he gets a yellow card 4 a dirty challenge 

Da supporters/haters

Injury No.7

Getting hes losers medal..lol

The winning team.... (Cunts)

Identity fraud! 

Forget that is was the last day of the premiership this weekend.. it was all about watching my home-boy in hes cup final... (even tho they got battered)


offthewALL